You just fall, they said.

Falling in love is something you can’t help. You just fall, they said. But I guess that does not mean the same thing all the time. It’s like falling down from the top of a building, you can’t control yourself from falling. But don’t you think some fall from the top of a building because it is their choice? You may fall accidentally or not, and it’s different from each other. You fall accidentally because you love the person without any reason to tell, without any thing to do, just fall. You fall NOT by accident because you really wanted to love that person, you made the first move to fall, you had the options but you choose to fall, and the result was you can’t help but fall. I used the word FALL many times not to be redundant, but to emphasize the glitches teens today are experiencing due to misinterpretation of the statement “falling in love.”

I’m inlove and I’m terrified.

This song called Terrified by K. McPhee & Z. Levi made me fall for someone, deeper. I hate to say this, but yes, I’m in love and I’m terrified. I’m afraid because I’m not sure of what state we were in, now. I assume because of the sweetness that person shows me. The feeling was different, I’m really confused. When I’m in the point of being okay, not caring, there’s always a scenario that makes me hold on to the feeling and hope that there’s something. This is crazy, I’m crazy. For that person. 😛 I’m hurt & tired, but I’m still hoping. I won’t give up.

Masarap magpatawad.

Hindi naman mawawala sa pagsasama ang alitan, ‘di pagkakasunduan, o away. Maging sa pagkakaibigan, relasyon o pamilya pa yan. Kung totoo kayo sa isa’t isa, maaayos din yan. Oras lang. Kung ang isa ay gumawa na ng paraan at hindi mo pinansin, ikaw na ang may problema diyan. Bigayan lang. Tapos na gawin nung isa ang dapat gawin para maayos, ikaw naman ang dapat kumilos. Hindi naman nakakahiyang magpatawad, ‘di ba? Alam mo, ang pride, parang gamot lang yan. Pag nilunok mo, nakakagaan ng pakiramdam. Kasi pag nagpatawad ka, wala ka ng mararamdaman na worry sa sarili mo. Mas magiging malaya ka. Wag mong isiping dahil sayang ‘yung pinagsamahan niyo, ang isipin mo’y dahil sayang yung mga oras na dapat masaya lang kayo at walang iniintinding problema. Kaya dapat matuto kang magpatawad, dahil dun mo mapapatunayan ang pagmamahal mo. Tulad ng Diyos, ilang beses ka naba niya pinatawad? Ganun din dapat tayo. Pare-pareho lang naman tayong tao, e. Hindi naman dahil sinabi mong “Pinapatawad na kita.” ay pinapatawad mo na talaga. Mas mabuti nang hindi mo sinabi yun basta sa puso mo’y pinatawad mo na siya. Ang sarili ay parang basurahan… ‘pag puno na ng ‘di magagandang bagay ay hindi na maganda, pero pag tinapon at inalis mo na ‘yung hindi magandang laman, hindi ba’t mas okay na?

Chains are well-connected.

You have friends there for you, and you are definitely there for those people. That’s why they stay. But what if you weren’t there for all of them? What if you stop caring too much? What if you give up being that person? Would anyone stay? Would anyone even bother to make you feel that you are worth to be with for the rest of their lives? That’s the hardest part of being a happy-go-luck and helpful person. No one knows that you need someone. All they can see is that you’re strong. All they can say is, “You can do it!” All they want to hear from you is that you are happy. But you know that you are not. You get to realize that the friend you want is what friend you are to others. You just need someone who can listen while you are being like an actor of a soap opera, and laugh with you like a mentally retarded person. A friend is not those who you start a conversation with; every now and then just to keep updated. Friendship is like chains, it won’t work and definitely not considered as chains if one holds tight but the other one loosen up, it will only be called chains if you both are equally in touched. That’s who you need. The one who’ll never forget and who’ll you never forget to check if everything’s okay. If you are only remembering him/her at times of trouble, you are not a friend. If you are only saying that you’ll be always there because that person is always there for you, you are not a friend. You can consider a person your friend by any means, but you can’t consider everyone the true ones. Friendship is like a lover’s relationship, it won’t work if only one gives importance to it. Both of you should. I envy the friendship I see in movies, they are like that close to each other. How I wish I could have my own TRUE friend. (No offense)

Changes do change things.

When you cry, you’re friend stays with you and tell you to be strong and you can do it. When you fall, you’re friend helps you to stand and rise again. What those people do is make you stronger. The more tears you release, the more strength you gain. The more down fall moment you have, the more courage you get to face the next one. You were changed by those people. They don’t want to see you and you don’t want to see yourself weak. But then, when you start gaining that courage, it seems like something’s change. Some of them would say that they don’t like the new you. Some of them would say that you are not this person they knew before. But the only clue you have is that you were stronger. That’s the time I learned something about human behavior. When you’re friend is weak, you stay and you’re like controlling him by saying be strong, and the time he gain that strength you wanted him to have, you’re just going to leave him and say that you don’t understand him. Remember, you were one of the reasons why he gained that strength. Instead of leaving him, why don’t you stay and say that you’re proud of whom he’d become.

Isipin at unawain, Maganda ang buhay!

Ngayon, ramdam ko na ‘yung paghihirap ni Hesus. Ang galing niya talaga. Kahit wala siyang ginagawang mali, handa siyang magsakripisyo para sa mga taong nakapaligid sa kanya. Kakampi man niya ito o hindi. Kahit gaano kabigat ang kasalanan mo, pinapatawad niya na agad. Aminin mo lang sa sarili mong nagkamali ka, gagaan na ang kalooban mo. Kahit madaming tao ‘yung nang-iwan sa kanya sa panahon na pinapahirapan siya, mas pinili pa rin niyang magpatawad kaysa magtanim ng sama ng loob. Hanggang sa huli, mas pinili pa rin niya ‘yung kapakanan ng iba kaysa sa sarili niya. Minsan sa buhay ko, naramdaman ko na ‘yung ganyan. Hindi man ako hinampas ng latigo, sinuotan ng kuronang tinik, naglakad ng malayo buhat-buhat ang mabigat na krus at ipinako dito … sa loob naman unti-unting tumutusok ‘yung sakit. Nagalit ako, nainis, pero napagtanto ko, si Hesus nga kahit gaano kasakit ‘yung naranasan niya, nakaya niyang magpatawad. Dahil sa kanya, kinaya ko din. Hindi mo mararamdaman ang biyaya at pagmamahal ng Diyos kung hindi ka lalapit sa Kanya, tulad sa tao, hindi mo mararamdaman ang pagpapatawad at pagmamahal niya kung pilit mong nilalayo ang sarili mo sa kanya. Sa bawat naranasan ni Hesus, may karanasan din tayong maihahalintulad doon. Hindi man particularly kay Jesus. Pero kahit kaninong karanasan man sa Bibliya. Isipin lang natin at unawain. Ang buhay ay hindi tungkol sa nagawang mali ng iba sa’yo, ito’y tungkol sa kapatawarang binibigay mo. Hindi nito binibilang kung ilang kabutihan ang nagawa mo, tinitignan nito kung hanggang sa huli’y magiging mabuti ka pa rin. Hindi man isumbat ni Jesus ang mga sakripisyo niya, pero sana dahil doon sa karanasan niya, matutunan nating maging mabuting tao.

Normal lang, umiibig din.

Hindi ako perpektong tao, hindi sobrang talino, hindi mayaman, at sakto lang ang itsura ko. Hindi ako ‘yong lalaking pag may naraanang babae ay makakarinig ng tilian at kalabog ng paa sanhi ng talunan dahil sa sobrang kilig. Normal lang ako. Wala akong advantage sa face value, pang-mid lang. Hindi ako nangongolekta ng tsiks. Hindi ako nagbibilang ng naging karelasyon, actually, isa pa lang talaga. Hindi ko alam kung wala nga ba akong panahon o sadyang takot lang ako. Takot, kasi hindi ko lang talaga alam gagawin ko. Hindi ako takot masaktan, takot lang ako makasakit. Hindi pa ako sigurado sa mga ganyang bagay, marami man akong napagdaanan sa buhay ko… ayan ‘yong bagay na hindi ko pa napagdaraanan ng ganun katagal. Nasasabi ko nga na kapag nakapagtapos na ako, tyaka ko iisipin yan… pero hindi pa rin maiwasan na minsan’y mapagnilayan ko ang ganyang bagay. Teenage love? Eto ba ‘yong sobrang kilig na kilig ka? Eto ba ‘yong pakiramdam na parang dalawa lang kayo sa mundong ibabaw? Ewan ko, ang korni ng utak ko, e. Pero malay natin, dumating din ‘yan. May dalawang taon pa naman ako bago maging young adult, atleast bata pa rin. Young, e, maipilit lang. Haha. Tulad nga ng sinabi ko, normal lang ako, gusto ko rin maranasan ‘yan. 🙂

Have enough and Give more.

I’m on my way home when I saw this kid inside a pedicab. Then his father arrived giving him a Regular fries from one popular fast food chain. I saw them both happy, thankful of what they have. So, I started to realize things… “Basically, when we are asked why we have more than what we need is because we can afford to buy those. But why can’t we just have enough and give that MORE to those who have less.” Maybe some would say that it’s not your fault why those people can’t afford such. But, disregard the fact that they have many children, disregard the fact that they’re unemployed, and think of helping. They are not employed because most firms accept only educated people. They are not educated because they can’t afford such. But as you help them, you are making them realize that they are still people. That there are still some people who could accept them. You are not to tolerate them to be dependent of others, but you are to give them hope. That even though they are in the lower state of life, there is still life. Appreciation is one of the factors to have a happy life. You have to be happy of what you have and of what you only need. Life is about how you share something to others and not just about how much you give something to yourself. Have enough, share more. 😉

May kaibigan ako.

Ang swerte ko dahil nakilala ko tong taong ito. Teenager lang, kaidaran ko. Hindi siya nakakatanda sa mga kaclose niya pero sobra kung galangin siya. Hindi siya mayaman tulad ng iba pero tinitingala siya. Hindi siya kadugo ng mga tao, pero minamahal at binibigyan ng importansya. Siya ang bossing ng mga kilala at nakakakilala niya. Ang daling lapitan. Hindi nanunumbat. Ang lakas makaintindi ng tao. Sobrang mapagbigay ng oras niya. Kahit na malayo, basta kailanganin siya, on the go lang. Stress reliever na ata niya ang pagtulong sa iba. Pano, masarap daw sa pakiramdam. Basta kaya niya, gagawin niya. Basta para sa iba, mas ginaganahan siyang gawin. Selfless siyang tao. Mas iniintindi niya yung iba kaysa sa sarili niya. Dun siya nagiging masaya, e. Sabi nga nila, Dun ka kung san ka magiging masaya. Napakaswerte ng mga taong nakapaligid sa kanya, isa na ako dun. Kuya, Boss at Adviser pa ng karamihan. Sasabihin lahat ng alam niya sa buhay para lang maintindihan mo kung bakit nangyayari sayo ang isang bagay. Hindi ka titigilan hangga’t maging okay ka. Kahit mabasa ang damit dahil sa luha mo, okay lang. Minsan may di nakakasundo, at may nakakagalit din pero wala siyang ginagawang masama dahil dun. Hinahayaan na lang niya hanggang maging okay na. Pero minsan naaawa ako sa kanya, sobrang bait kasi at mapag-intindi. Kahit magmukha na siyang tanga, wala siyang paki. Hindi man perpekto, pero idol ko siya. Sobrang buting tao. May bisyo man, wala namang tinatapakang tao at hindi nagbago. May malambot na puso pero matapang na personalidad. Tahimik kadalasan pero pag nagsalita na, madami kang matututunan. Ang unique niyang tao. Sana makilala mo din siya. :>